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2005-08-10 - 11:48 a.m.

Again, I haven't written in an eon or so and I suppose it's because I get overwhelmed or busy or tired or there's too much to write. I figured, I should add beore it gets too far along and the characters change once again.

I mentioned my night out with "Detroit" but I neglected to write about my night out with a man I just call "Beck" mostly because of his uncanny resemblance and his love for music.

I met him at a nightclub a few weeks ago. He walked up to me and said hello and we started chatting. He was very sweet and adorable and as it turns out incredibly intelligent and very knowledgable about music.

He does beats for a pretty famous hip hop producer out here who has done songs for people such as Ludacris and lil Kim. In addition to this he composes music for soundtracks and also does some sound engineering. You know like throwing stuff off his garage, recording it and remixing it...

I find this all ridiculously attractive in him. He's insanely passionate about it and I love that. Passion about something is a beautiful thing...especially when they are actively pursuing their passion...

I find I am lacking this severely at the moment and am desperate to reignite my creative passions...but that's another day :)

Anyhoo, so "Beck" was very sweet and very complimentary. Apparently very into my face which he couldn't seem to stop talking about, but then it may have been the booze.

Now I should preface this story by mentioning that I actually went to this bar to meet Napolean Dynamite, but he wasnt there yet and "Beck" got to me before Napolean showed up. Which, as it turned out was a very good thing.

I'm glossing over that night because it was too complex and insane to even begin to capture here in text. Basically...Napolean showed up...we spent some time together...I ended up back talking to Beck...Gave him my number...and he left...

Napolean and I exchanged some words and that was the end of that.

Anyhoo...that seems like ages ago.

Beck called me the next day which is what men are SUPPOSED to do, I was pleased to see he wasn't playing games. We chatted and ended up making a date for the following week.

He picked me up in Hollywood and we hit a couple of bars. One, The Tiki Ti on Sunset I had always wanted to go to and the second, The Good Luck Bar, I already loved. So he got huge bonus points for his knowledge of cool tucked away LA bars.

We had a great evening which ended up with us at a gay hamburger stand in West Hollywood at midnight. I was impressed he took it all in stride mind you.

It can;'t be easy to eat nachos when there is a huge big screen TV playing every bad euro trash pop disco hit in front of you as the owner "Hamburger Mary" sauntered back and forth in a miniskirt and pink wig.

more points...

Anyhoo...we had a really good time...he made a comment during the evening regarding us going out again but that he was being presumptuous..and I had said of course I would.

Men, so silly

Anyhoo...great night...problem is...he's painfully busy. Did I mention his 3 jobs? He mentioned it was hard to date because of his schedule, and I'm wondering how patient I can be...It's becoming like once a week I hear from him, and I'm not really enjoying the feeling. I keep saying to myself the right guy is worth it...but I'm left feeling empty inside wishing it could be more but knowing it can't.

It's a similar situation with "Detroit", He is also ridiculously busy and tired and now he's moved temporarily in with the 6 guys in the band he's managing...le sigh

I saw him the other night for a couple of hours after he had a ridiculously long 14 hour day, and while it was wonderful just to spend time with him...I feel short changed.

I guess it's a trade men in places in their careers where they are just climbing the hill leaves little time for relationships even though they both say they desire seems almost like an impossibility.

So, again I'm left wondering if the right man will be worth the wait and who, indeed, is the right man?

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